Dessert Don't Hurt

I have a mantra about dessert: "Always." I believe dessert is the reward you earn for being a commendable person, or for not spending too much money that day, or for washing behind your ears. It is the after-dinner award that pairs well with coffee. It is sugar and spice and everything...fattening.

When I was younger, I discovered my mother was not a "just-because" baker, she was a "special occasion" baker. When she threw on her apron, it was because Christmas Eve was tomorrow or someone we loved had died. She baked in the face of excitement and sympathy. She baked with purpose or she didn't bake at all.

If kitchen-stress is genetic, it, without a doubt, forgets to skip a generation--I caught it like a cold. I didn't find the clank of pots and pans euphonious; there was something so taxing about it. Perhaps it was that in my microwave-enthusiast perception of it all, baking meant a mess to clean up. It also probably meant something was over or undercooked, a doughy catastrophe, a failed attempt.

In college, I met girls my age who baked because they liked to be in the kitchen---because there was something tranquil about slow, slow Rod Stewart on the radio and brownie batter. I gravitated toward these people; I had to unearth what it was that separated them from me: their serenity from my stress.

And then, I put my finger on it. They were not baking. They were creating.

So, I began to create desserts, allowing simple, health(ier) ingredients to exist beside each other. I gave fat free Cool Whip its due and stopped feeling like a criminal for using chocolate.

This summer, my mother and I experimented with using frozen Cool Whip as a substitute for ice cream. First, we let it exist alone as an ice cream. We crushed up 100 Calorie packets of Oreos and sprinkled them in, letting the mixture freeze overnight. Perfect substitute for Cookies and Cream ice cream, right? Absolutely not. The next day, we found our "ice cream" was caulk-like enough to use for home repair.

The secret is: let the Cool Whip serve as an inclusion, not a dish. Give it enough attention, but not enough attention to where it's a one-man show. It should complement, not conduct. If you want an ice cream that conducts, try Ben. (See Also: Jerry)

Ice-Cream-Sandwich-Substitute:

You'll need:

Low Fat Honey Graham Crackers (or any Low Fat version of this cookie)

Strawberries (thinly sliced)

Fat Free Cool Whip

Then, spread the Cool Whip on the graham crackers however gingerly or heartily you'd like. But remember, Cool Whip is an inclusion. Don't get crazy. Slice your strawberries as thin as paper. Very important. Thin, like paper, and layer them on top of the Cool Whip.

Like this:

Then, freeze them overnight and enjoy!